The Reassuring Lie vs. The Inconvenient Truth

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

The battle for our hearts and minds is often waged between these two intangible yet formidable foes. Each opponent has on its side an impressive arsenal of weapons that it unleashes in the attempt to own our attention. Although The Reassuring Lie (TRL) has an impressive record of wins, the magnitude of the victories of The Inconvenient Truth (TIT) are difficult to ignore and when you know “the truth” it can indeed set you free.

The lie is of course, that you can’t do it. The lie reminds you that you are not smart enough, tall enough, educated enough, old enough and in some cases, young enough. TRL makes you feel okay about these “facts” because it is not your fault. You’ve done your best and doing “your best” is all you should ask of yourself. The lie, as with all lies, is completely untrue, but it feels copasetic, it is familiar and it will do.

The Inconvenient Truth is that you can do it. You are smart enough, tall enough and you are the perfect age, down to the day in fact. Today is always the optimal time to give more effort. The truth is that it will take more concentrate, dedication and tenacity that you’ve put into anything before, but it is very possible, doable and infinitely worth it.

What makes the lie so reassuring? Why is the truth inconvenient? Marianne Williamson poem “Our Greatest Fear” may offer some insight and encouragement.

Our Greatest Fear – Marianne Williamson

"Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, talented, fabulous?"
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that
other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us, it's in ALL of us.
As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."

This poem may be too cerebral or celestial depending on your inclination, but it does offer an acceptable explanation for why we might choose the “lie” over the “truth”. The fear of failure, fear of change and fear of getting your hopes up only to have them dashed are all powerful inhibitors. Fear can lead us to believe a mediocre lie over a much more powerful truth.

At this point I can think of no universally acceptable solution to eschewing The Reassuring Lie and embracing the Inconvenient Truth. For me it is a daily battle as well. I think at the end of the day my biggest fear is not failure, but giving up the pursuit of better. I fear the thought that I might run out of ambition before I reach my goals.

Maybe there is a reassuring truth after all. Since everyday is a gift and a chance to recommit ourselves to our highest aspirations and loftiest ideals, maybe the truth isn’t so inconvenient after all. Perhaps there exists an optimal balance between truth and assurance. Maybe one day the lie will prove inconvenient. I think, however, that that choice is largely in our own hands.

Alexander Michael Gittens

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